3 Key Ingredients for Improving Your Relationships

by | Sep 13, 2021 | Healthy Relationships

Today, I have two questions for you:

  1. What conversations do you wish you were having, but aren’t?

  2. What gets in the way of you initiating the conversations you want to have?

Here’s what I often hear from people when I ask the second question:

  • I don’t know how to start the conversation.

  • I ‘m not prepared for what they might say back.

  • I don’t want to hurt their feelings.

  • I’m scared they’ll get upset with me.

  • I don’t want to put the effort in.

  • I’m not sure it really matters.

What are your reasons?

All transformation begins with awareness.
Awareness leads to choice, freedom, and new possibilities.

So let’s start with this awareness: Improving your relationships and conversations is actually quite simple (but not easy).

Here are 3 key ingredients to focus on:

  1. Your Way of Being: This ingredient has the greatest impact on the quality of your relationships by far. When you bring an open heart, a non-defensive spirit, a present, curious, and engaged self, resonance and attunement can flow more easily.

  2. Your Way of Listening: Learn to listen beneath the surface, for what people actually mean instead of what they say. Listen for their feelings, their needs, their longings.  Listen to find shared humanity, connection, understanding.

  3. Your Way of Expressing: Make sure your choice of words is deeply aligned with your deeper intentions. What are you attempting to create or influence with your words, your tone of voice, your energy, and your attitude?

Next week, I’ll share the 4 transformative stages you’ll want to get comfortable navigating through when you want to improve your relationships and your conversations.

And P.S. on the subject of relationships, here’s a clip from my YouTube channel about the difference between enabling someone and actually being of help to someone in their healing journey:


Here are a few of my programs that might be of interest to you:

  • Conversations from the Heart, a free Q&A learning forum on Wednesdays at 10am CT. LEARN MORE

  • Membership, a deep dive into personal growth with a dedicated community. LEARN MORE

  • Private Consultations, one-on-one guidance and coaching for your specific life situations. LEARN MORE

1 Comment

  1. Tom Esch

    so clear Yvette…thanks again for your wisdom…
    Meeting needs leads to less violence!


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