Lead with “Yes, And…”

“And” helps us bridge differences, make connections, and see our shared humanity and shared needs. Once we decide to let go of our defensiveness, our fears, our resistance, and instead start working with life on its terms, we free ourselves up for more play and creativity in all aspects of our lives.
How to Express Appreciation

In your relationships with other humans, you tend to get more of what you focus upon. Here’s how to express a heartfelt appreciation towards someone you care about.
The 4 Stages of a Good Conversation

I often think of conversations as the life-force that enlivens – or throttles – relationships. Conversations are never really complete. They are ongoing. Winding. Emergent. Unpredictable. And, when they are life-affirming and generative, conversations tend to go through some very predictable stages.
Vaccine Conversations

When I mentioned to my mother that I was going to be offering a workshop on how to approach “the vaccine conversation” nonviolently, she laughingly empathized with, “Oh my, you’ve just put yourself in the middle of a hornet’s nest.”
It certainly feels that way.
4 Ways to Connect in Relationships

On a recent group coaching call, I got a number of big questions about how to heal from trauma. In the moment, I remembered how the simple practice of connecting with others and with ourselves can be a fundamental tool for healing. Connection can be healing. With that in mind, I responded by sharing the four key distinctions we try to make when we want to connect rather than disconnect in our communication and our relationships.
Tuning Into the Energy Behind Your Words
Sometimes, we start talking simply to discharge built up energy. We vent, we rage, we think out loud, we process verbally, we gossip, and we form alliances with others. Other times, we’re speaking because we want to bridge a gap between parts of ourselves or between ourselves and other people.
As you dive into your next conversation, slow down for a moment and ask yourself, why am I speaking right now? What am I trying to achieve?
5 Ways to Have Better Conversations, Across the Divide
How to stand for the values and human needs we deeply want to serve in the world, in the most generous, skillful and connected ways possible.
4 Key Practices for Responding to Triggering Comments

Let’s change the conversations, show up in our full humanity, maintain our commitment to increasing consciousness and compassion, and cultivate creative new conversations that move things forward!
How to Heal a Rift: 9 Phrases to Try.
Accept what the other person wants, honor their boundaries and preferences, reconnect and heal the pain … if and when you can.
When You Don’t Know What To Say
As I was facilitating a group last week, a male participant I’ve known for a long time directed some sexually-laden, provocative comments to me in front of the group. Although I was caught off guard, I began by bantering something back (I hardly remember what I even said) attempting to field this with grace while […]