[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text admin_label=”Text” _builder_version=”4.25.2″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″]

Are you struggling to know what to say next, and longing for some new scripts that connect with others?

Whether are having personal or professional conversations, it can time some intentionality and effort for us to find the right words, especially when we’re trying to come up with scrips that connect with others instead of leading to more disconnection.

Here are two principles and practices to help you ground yourself in more connected conversations:

Two Practices to Generate Your Own Scripts that Connect:

•  First: Become firmly rooted in your own feelings and needs.  The deeper and more solidly you can be grounded in yourself, the easier you’ll be able to sense into the feelings and needs of the other person, and the more smoothly you’ll be able to navigate the conversation.

• Second: Reframe, restate, repeat.  Checking for understanding step-by-step and point-by-point while the other person is speaking does two things:  it ensures you’re on the correct course and truly understand what it is that the other person is feeling and needing, and it sends a signal that you’re actively taking in what the other person is saying.  When we hear our words said back to us, it often calms our nervous system, which deescalates tension and allows for a more open-hearted and less defensive conversation.

On this week’s podcast, I workshop four different scripts that connect with callers who bring in a variety of personal and professional situations.

We examine:

• 1:06  When you’d love to hear something tender from a parent. “Please tell me you love me, dad.”
• 8:54  When you want to navigate a termination as gently and clearly as possible.  “I’m sorry, but you’re fired.”
• 15:47  When you’re trying to sort out whether or not you and someone else are wanting the same things . “I want to stay.  Do you want that, too?”
• 29:16  When you’re wanting to set loving limits as a parent. “Dear child, this is my boundary.”

Want even more ways to create scripts that connect?  Check out Preparing for Your Next Conversation.

What phrases and approaches have you found to be more useful in connecting with others when things get glitchy?

I’d love to know.  Leave a comment below.

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]