#93 Too Much, Too Loud, Too Honest? Try Soft Power.
I’ve lost track of how many times someone has said it, either directly or indirectly. You’re too much. You’re a lot. You could be a little more tactful. Maybe just… tone it down?
And I’ve also lost track of how many times I’ve tried. Tried to keep my tone neutral. Tried to swallow my opinions. Tried to “pick my battles.” Tried to show up “less.”
But here’s what I’ve learned: most of us who’ve been labeled “too much” are not the problem. What we are is passionate. Clear. Fierce. Often protective. And deeply committed to something we believe matters.
The problem isn’t our intensity.
The problem is when that intensity leaks out in ways that others experience as controlling, shaming, or overwhelming, especially when we’re dysregulated or feeling unseen.