What (Not) to Do When Triggered

As I was helping two people work through a conflict a few weeks ago, one of them turned to me and snapped,

“So basically you’re accusing me of being abusive?”

I took a deep breath.

“OK. Let’s slow down … first, am I understanding what you are telling me accurately: You said you called your partner a liar, swore at them multiple times, raised your voice, followed them from room to room after they asked for a time out and then shattered a glass on the floor between the two of you – is that right?”

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