, Psy.D., LP

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Embrace Negativity

Why Being “Positive” Might Be Bad For You

Have you noticed the cultural pressure to “Be Positive” or “Be Strong” or “Focus on the Good”? It’s as if we think that acknowledging or empathizing with painful experiences inadvertently creates more of them. I hear it all the time. “I would never do therapy,” someone said to me disdainfully, “All that focus on bad feelings and old stories will […]

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Bowing Out Gracefully

This week I have the pleasure of responding directly to a question that someone recently sent me: I was recently having a conversation with my sister about how to gracefully bow out of a situation when we know we need to give ourselves time to re-energize.   I specifically want to find ways to say […]

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Hoping I Am Wrong

Recently my 18-year old step-daughter shared a compelling piece of wisdom with me that I want to pass on to you! You know those situations where someone does something unexpected or surprising and you really don’t like it? Perhaps your feelings get hurt, or you think they misunderstood you, or you don’t trust where they […]

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Will Revenge Make Me Feel Better?

Walking the dog this morning, I noticed my mind playing out a revenge fantasy that I have been harboring. Have you noticed how when people hurt us in deeply enduring and life-altering ways, we sometimes feel like the only way out of our pain and suffering is to hand it back to them in the […]

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