, Psy.D., LP

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All about Needs - Happy couple

All About Needs

Last week, I received this lovely question: “I love how much more literate in feelings I am now, however honestly, I just don’t really get the universal human needs.Like how to actually connect to them and communicate about them in real life in real time? It always just seems totally forced and out of touch. This […]

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Ready for Love

How To Know If You Are Ready For Love

I remember telling my therapist (long, long ago) that the one thing I wanted to work on in therapy was why I was drawn like a moth to a flame to romantic partners who inevitably caused me tremendous distress and heartache.   I could recognize them from a mile away, but inexplicably still sought them out.   Clearly my internal […]

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Embrace Negativity

Why Being “Positive” Might Be Bad For You

Have you noticed the cultural pressure to “Be Positive” or “Be Strong” or “Focus on the Good”? It’s as if we think that acknowledging or empathizing with painful experiences inadvertently creates more of them. I hear it all the time. “I would never do therapy,” someone said to me disdainfully, “All that focus on bad feelings and old stories will […]

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