Love is Louder

Being a person is hard. So many relationships are founded on entrenched patterns of judgment, criticism, blame, shame, manipulation, “feedback” (whatever that even means), analysis & evaluations.To make things worse, I then internalize these ways of thinking and...

Bittersweet Mourning

I know when a break-down is brewing. I start getting short and curt with people. I am irritable about things that normally don’t bother me. I can’t remember what I did a few hours ago. I stop returning emails and phone calls. I make decisions based on what other...

Has Anyone Ever Been Embarrassed By You?

Yesterday I dropped off my daughter at summer tennis lessons, went to pay the fee, and found out that I would be charged a $45 surcharge each month because I wasn’t a resident of this particular suburb. I impulsively blurted out with irritation, “Oh Shit, you must be...
Feeling Criticized? Try This.

Feeling Criticized? Try This.

When I used to hear things like: “Don’t take this personally, but …” or “I am not trying to criticize you, but …” my hackles would rise in preparation. My loyal defenses would kick in (we all know whatever follows that “but” is not going to be good) and I would...